thoughts of the night

recently, i have alot of free time due to the leaves and off i am taking which signifies the end of my NSF life is nearing. 2yrs of waiting for this moment, but it only took 2 weeks to realise it isn't all that great. without the pink IC, there is basically no legit job i can take. hence i am looking for students to give tuitions to, but to no avail till now. i am living my days using countdown. i have played very little games since entering national services, and now, i have lost interest in them too. i am not sure if thats true, or just because the quality and gameplay of the games now are too shallow. if anyone still remember final fantasy 7, thats what i call a good game. graphic isn't a problem, the touching and emotional storyline is what makes it captivating.

having so much time, thoughts have flooded my mind whenever i am busy doing nothing. memories... fond memories came flowing in. during schooling terms, i have alot of interactions with people. people i like, people i dislike, all of them. it has never come across my mind that, one day, i might be deprived of this kind of previlege. i have lost contact with most people since entering national service. at the start, it does not affect me much. but as time goes on, it acts like a cancer, hiding somewhere in your body, only erupting after much time have passed. lonliness starts to fill my heart. to all, i might be very cheerful, teasing people whenever i could. sacarsm isn't something not known to all that met me. i did what i did to make an effect to lighten up everyone's day. it might not be funny sometimes, but i put in alot of effort to try. and when everything ends, at the end of the day, when i am alone at home, sometimes i feel so depressed. not those severe depression case, but a case of sadness. trying to bring happiness to others, has anyone given a thought to me?

i really missed the times when i was with my friends during schools... KBPS, ZHSS, YJC, NYJC... some of them are particularly good to me... and it only deepen my misses for them... but i also do realise that, what ever happen in the past, might not happen again due to the everchanging society... a girl might be very nice and helpful to me in the past... now she only treats me normally and is oblivious to my existence... no matter how hard i try... it will never go back to how it was in the past... memories... and this will teach me a lesson. no matter what happened, at the end of the day, look back and cherish the people around you. make it known to them the next day, as you will not know when the changes will be taking place...

Superband (2nd round result)

omg! glamour is out. doesn't matter anyway since i am not a fan of their singing too. but its a shocking result nonetheless. Amber vs Glamour, Amber is obviously the much weaker link, but it survived. gratz. poor Glamour, 2nd team to be eliminated. it wasn't as if they will go too far and i don't like them @ all honestly. but seeing 夏日风 still in the competition makes me wonder... does singaporean have hearing problem or do they support weirdos and phenomenal performances? the chance of seeing a team like 夏日风 in such a widely publicised tournament clearing 2nd round is equivalent to seeing a shooting star in the urban area. life goes on, who can stop those filthy riches? the more filthy rich 1s i guess

Superband (2nd round)

ok, here is my comments on the teams. scores are my opinions, =D

B1. Amber
the members of this band has weak voices and isn't organised enough. the music is alright though.
6.5/10

B2. 夏日风
a disaster. its like a tornado hitting singapore. and i mean a real bad tornado killing everyone in singapore. i wonder how they made it so far. 1 out of the 13 bands... come on, even personnels in army can sing better and have better organisation. can't hear a thing from start till end, girl's voice is VERY WEAK. boys can't sing. cannot dance. a bunch of... newspaper boys girls
4/10

B3. 迷路兵
very organised. lead has an unique and good voice. other memebers in the band also contributed to the good singing. nice music too. very good setup!
9/10

B4. Glamour
not bad. dance is quite ok. individual voice is not very good... but as a whole, 5 not so good singing seem to cover each other up and make it sounds ok.
7.5/10

B5. 馒头
lead is getting better with each performance. great improvement. music is good, but too little interaction... overall good.
8/10

B6. Brodz
still the best imo. even without any music equipments, their skilled singing makes up for it. perfect singing skill. complement each other very well.
9/10

B7. 史诺比
superband. this is a bunch of clowns. a superband-wannabe. the lead, who is the only chinese, is crap. total crap. its due to the 'hyperactive jumping monkey' that they can go this far. WWF have change to WWE. from federation to entertainment. SuperBand ain't gonna change into SuperEntertainer anytime soon. this is crap.
6.5/10

B8. J3
superb. very organised. singing very synchronised. music is very good. its not just the lead. everyone in J3 is good @ singing. 2 thumbs up + 2 big toes up!
9/10

B9. Soul
singing not bad. very good dance and coordination. the typical boyband. if only singing is a tad better.
8/10

B10. Lucify
lead is not bad, has a little problem @ high pitch. performance was OK, but very boring throughout. not even close to high.
7/10

B11. Jade
crazy. they chose a song by 萧萧 - 爱要坦荡荡. omg. an all guy band choosing a girl's song. singing no high no low. flat all the way. not organised. imo, a disaster, 2nd to 夏日风.
6/10

B12. Juz-B
bagus. their chinese might very well be better than 90% of singaporeans. their mouths are their main assets. no music equipment can match their mouths. very organised.
9.5/10

B13. 静爆乐团
disaster. every member is playing their own stuff. drummer playing his drum @ his own tempo, singer singing his song @ his own beat. great. a great way to end a show of lameness. forget about Lucify being 2nd worst. this is truly the 2nd worst.
5.5/10

my prediction : 夏日风 to be kicked out. its kind enough for them to go so far. time to add some quality to this show.

F.E.A.R (First Encounter Assault Recon)

omg man... this is ridiculous... spending 1+hr playing a game that freaked me out so much... yea, its F.E.A.R. First Encounter Assault Recon. i am now mentally unstable from all the shock and tension given to me by the game. i am not gonna touch it anymore... its... pure... 3vil... i tried playing with my mum @ home and can't even take the scare... never will i play it alone... or even play it again... god... scary...

a walk in the neighbourhood

just went to rivervale mall to place a couple of bets. small 1s, $5 ea, haha! just so that the match will be more exciting. on my way back, down the escalator, i seemed to have met fiona on 2nd floor. she's my sec sch fren. anyway, i did not get to talk to her, since i am on the escalator down to first floor. and when i am almost home, i thought i met one of my female working colleague. she's with her boyfriend i suppose. it took me quite long to realise that, and i did not have the courage to acknowledge her... duhz. dude, whats wrong wif me? sigh...

lotsa misses...

i missed the old coy0te and sPaCe_GaL...

UTOPIA (browser based online game)

hey, anyone playing utopia next age? if you are, drop me a message, =D

(you should know what is utopia if you are even reading this topic =D)

anyone need tuition?

hey! i am looking for students who need tuition. good @ basic maths and languages. teaching the following subjects below.

Primary
-----------------------------------------------
English, Chinese, Mathematics, Science

Secondary
-----------------------------------------------
English, Chinese, Maths, E Maths, A Maths

Junior college
-----------------------------------------------
Chinese, Maths C

if you have faith in me, feel free to approach me, =D

a fruitful day

phew, finally done packing a % of my stuff in my small room. most are virtual stuff. datas. burned alot of DVDs and CDs to store them too. variety shows, drama, anime... the list just goes on. and i realised something while renaming, arranging, burning these stuff. i actually does have alot of stuff that i have not seen before. a few drama, alot of animes. and i just kept waiting for the few anime and variety show to come out every week. gosh. time to watch them all during my free time (24hrs a day including slp).

jobs - to take or not to take?

hi guys. as you all should know (or knowing now) i am clearing leave now. TADA! so happy. but i am jobless. =( thats bad. why? nobody wants me? i am incapable? TEH! WRONG! this is becos, 95% of the advertisements in the newspaper are SCAMS. yes. SCAMS. ok, i am risking alot by writing this in my friendster account. there might be thousands of f*ckers that will hunt me down by helping those who are reading tis. but... who cares? who f*cking mess with me, i f*cking call police. in SG, i dun chap gang, i chap police (mean police makes me able to project the right idea to every1). ok. 1st of all, look at your straits time. what jobs will you see? let me tell you. telemarketeers. surveyors. tuition coordinatiors. multi-level marketing. ok, i admit MLM isn't put up on paper. but SO? its WORSE. its DAYLIGHT ROBBERY by your FRIENDS. yes, your FRIENDS. to some extent, they are worse than CITY HARVEST. maybe both got fight lar. back to topic. what are the jobs about? telemarketeers - ppl who call others with the data given, tell them they win a prize, come collect, lock in room, talk to them, blast music, brainwash, make you fork out 10-20k. sounds like CITY HARVEST? got fight.
surveyors. survey ok ma, NUS NTU also gt call me go do lor. cannot ar? can. but these surveys are not normal surveys. they are for data collection purposes. for wat? call my lao pei lao bu for wat? datas for telemarketeers. understand? tuition coordinators. WAH, WHY NOT? so many ppl wan teach tuition. here's how it works. they ask you go there, sell you a database, ask you go home match, match liao got $$. NABEI!! SO SONG YOU TELL ME CANNOT DO?! YOU LAO CH*E BY*! go do lor. the same database sell to 5k ppl, go match lar. if you find this useful, post a testimonial to support me in writing more of these to help out those looking for jobs. CHEERS!

张栋梁 - 《痛彻心扉》

回忆充满整个房子

我们的住处

围困我笑也不会茶也不思

一个人恍恍又惚惚

相爱的国度里没有人居住

回忆混乱我的脚步

阻碍了出路

证明了你的自私你的贪图

残忍的看着我无助

平淡的回应我虚假的无辜

痛彻心扉记忆的伤一寸一寸像你的冷酷

否定我这些日子以来的付出

告诉我不再需要有我来保护

不能睡的痛楚不知名的愤怒

不能上诉只能安静的痛哭

靠岸 - 林宇中

　　妳坐在我身边 可是表情很不自然
　　聊的话很平凡 却很悲伤
　　
　　妳说妳不相信 活着就是为了梦想
　　甚至妳更怀疑 什么是地久天长
　　
　　咖啡麻醉不了孤单 只会让心更烫
　　哦 都一样 所谓梦想 终究飘飘荡荡
　　在迷乱的台北流浪 寻找一个幻想
　　突然很渴望在我身上 找到妳要的靠岸
　　
　　这一刻 当我们都感觉到彼此的心愿
　　爱情早已经开始 思念早已经蔓延
　　
　　咖啡麻醉不了孤单 只会让夜更长
　　我 也一样 飘飘荡荡 眼神交换迷惘
　　在冷漠的台北流浪 找一个避风港
　　突然很渴望在妳身上 也找到我要的 靠岸

rainy dream

woke up at 3pm today. 10 mins ago, the sun was still shining bright. now, a heavy rainpour follows. it has been very long since i saw such a heavy rain. rain is often associated with depression. it seems true. i had a dream earlier on, hardly had it before. i can roughly remember the content of my dream. due to some reason, i was together with a sweet girl. we were very happy, and i often rest leaning on her side by side. holding her by her waist, holding her tightly. there was never a moment we are not happy. it was such a wonderful dream that i hated myself for waking up and attempted to go back into the dreamland. obviously, i failed. the dream displayed my thoughts and somehow, i am entitled to the luxury of having a sweet girl by my side for the duration of the dream. dream is nice, rain is nice. looking out at the window, droplets of rain hitting hard on the floor. mixed feeling of happiness and depression...