To be or not to be?

Should I continue to be myself or should I be someone that is like everyone else?

Practice makes perfect. When you have done something repeatedly forever, it becomes part of you and just comes naturally.

I've been through a lot since young, due to the fact that I came from an incomplete family. Thanks to that, I have the authority to make my own decisions, and eventually realize that this world is full of deceits. Having conned twice by "friends", $6k wasn't a small sum of money back then. I came from a poor family, therefore it was through scrimp and save that I managed to muster up that kind of money. This further reinforced the importance of trust and honesty in my life.

As we grew older, we are more exposed to temptations. Most, if not all, of us have succumbed to temptations. The only difference is how deeply are we sucked into it. Spending big money on myself has never been an option since young. But still, the sense of achievement gotten from breeding has made me invest quite a sum in my aquarium.

Despite that, I've stuck to my principles faithfully. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Based on how much I value trust and honesty, I would almost never do anything that would deviate from my values. But at the same time, this has caused me a lot of problems.

I would expect the same from people around me. To err is human. I would try my best to forgive and forget. But as mentioned earlier, most people would have developed habitual characteristics by now.

Who doesn't like to hear sweet nothing? When one is facing problem, what he/she wants to hear will most probably be how he/she is not at fault and how others are the cause of his/her problem.

Any person who tell you that it's your fault and how you can change to make things better, is most probably going to be on your hate list for quite some time.

The truth is that, people have evolved into something that can't readily accept the truth. Back to the times where our great-grandparents were still around, everyone would be more than willing to accept advice and criticism. This is because, that is the only way they can improve and survive! It was a fight for survival back then.

But now, we have become a monster of our own. There isn't a dire need for survival. Survival is already a non-issue in our current society. We have complained more than ever about how we couldn't afford a car or how we couldn't afford more of that branded goods on the shelf. We lost the motivation to improve ourselves and deteriorated into self-patting beings. We would expect everything from others and yet expect others to expect nothing from us! This is what we have become.

One would expect you to be less whiny while he/she would complain at every opportunity. One would expect you to be nice to them while he/she treat you otherwise. One would expect you to do everything for him/her, yet do nothing for you.

"You shouldn't expect something in return for everything you do!"

It means that I can't be bothered to entertain you, but I still expect you to fulfill all my wishes regardless.

"What you see is what you get. Take it or leave it."

A way to say, I'll continue treating you like shiat. If you want to continue talking to me, you have got to treat me nicely. If you're going to treat me like shiat too, then fcuk off.

What ever happened to equality? Aren't we taught that we have to work for what we want?

When someone starts talking about trust, honesty and integrity, everyone would agree that those are the most important values on Earth. But have any one of you wondered, if everyone agreed that those are the most important values ever, then where did all those backstabbers and liars come from?

Most of us have developed a trait that is capable of assuming any positive trait to be ours, without necessarily possessing them.

Behind the computer screen, everyone will talk about their SOB stories and how they have been mistreated, blah blah blah. Hardly will they talk about their shortcomings. What's even scarier, is that people will tend to "share" others' traits on the internet. It's easy to say "me too!" when another person is narrating an experience displaying his/her positive traits.

The world has never been crazier since the beginning of the internet age. The worth of trust and honesty has plummeted to that of a causal talk.

It makes me wonder... should I stick to my principles or join the self-deceiving hoard...

Bo jio?

*If your sense of humor isn't as low as mine, do skip to the end for a better read (: *

You know hor, when you grow older, everyone also busy this busy that. Everybody work work work, bobian. Last time, midnight play soccer also need to take turn, cos too many people. But now, jio eat rice also hard.

Why leh?

Must be too busy working lor.

O rly?

When I was young hor, we see who missing from the outing, we will say, "wa lao eh, kelian leh him/her. Confirm is mother no let out lor."

But now hor, your mother still will control you go out no go out meh? Cannot be lar hor?

Last time, aiyoyo lao shi sibei hot sia. Liang xi mei also sibei hot sia. People call it what ar... Trend! Yar, trend!

Recently got a trend leh. My friends and I go out hor, then will have a lot of people keep saying, "Bo jio!". Damn paiseh sia, we go out, no jio them, not brother enough. Nevermind. Limpei's fault, cos i not brother enough. NEXT TIME! Limpei confirm guarantee chop jio you.

NEXT TIME come liao. Limpei jio you liao. But hor, you always bue sai make it leh! Sometimes is you already got activities. Sometimes is your friend last minute jio you. Sometimes is your sister give birth. Sometimes is your dog diarrhea.

Understandable lar!

1 time. 2 times. N times. How come always cannot one? Not enough people also a reason. Waaa, bue gum leh!! I never jio you, you say i bo jio. Limpei jio you, you knn sibei zuay excuse.

Limpei look like PIMP to you ar??? Invite you to our small gathering, you kpkb so few people. Don't need do anything then the outing will grow people out ar?? Nabei, you want zhar bor then ownself find lar. Do I look like human trafficker to you??

Wa lao eh, you also zi dong a bit lar. Mouth don't be so jian, talk talk talk den no action. Say this say that, in the end one pile of shiat come out. Limpei is talk loyalty, integrity and honesty 1. You don't have, then siam far far lar. Knn mouth keep running, you bue sian limpei also sian lar. Bo jio bo jio. Jio liao say not enough people. Still got all sort of cock stories. You think I primary school ar? Cannot differentiate is it? Nabei, eat so big liao, still so childish. Don't want den say don't want, act gu niang give so much crap. Be a man, do the right thing lor. Russell Peters also like that say lor.

This kind of people, how to trust?? Imagine limpei one day accident, need blood transfusion:

In the hospital...

Phua bei kia A: "Eh, you also here ar?"

Phua bei kia B: "Yar lor. He kana knocked down also bo jio."

Phua bei kia A: "So you going to donate blood to him or not?"

Phua bei kia B: "Dunno leh. Got how many people ar?"

Phua bei kia A: "3 only leh i think."

Phua bei kia B: "Huh? Only 3 ar?? Aiyo... then I think I don't want donate liao lar..."

Wa lao ehhhh, yao siu lor like that. I think I better go prepare a few more bags of blood in my fridge liao. Mai tu liao!!!

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Everything written above is based on a real-life experience and is supposedly being portrayed in a comical way. I honestly don't feel angry with these people, but instead, feel disappointed and to a certain extent, pitiful for them.

I'm someone who takes promises very seriously. I can joke and fool around in casual situations, but when it comes to promises, I am dedicated to fulfilling them. Maybe that is why I expect people to do the same too.

I seriously don't mind anyone not joining upon invited. It's not as if our outing will be less fun without that particular person. It was out of respect and courtesy that we asked.

Maybe me and my friends have judged them wrongly, so if you're interested, you can develop your own view on the character mentioned below.

Character A

He would always say, "Go XXX leh". Yes, I used ALWAYS. He would also promised to organize some activities, which 98% of the times, ended up with nothing. No news, no followup. There was even once when he rejected me for prawning using a lame excuse, and guess what? When me and my friends reached the prawning area, we saw him with another group of friends. And of course, his group of friends has girls, mine are all guys.

Due to the bad experiences with him, I decided to leave him out of the loop for future outings. He would then say, "Bo jio!". Fine. We tried asking him out again. Not once, but multiple times. Again, we were being played. Still, he would give all sorts of lame excuses and act as if he did nothing wrong. He would view it as, "I just wasn't available, I didn't pangseh." He even made a promise to join us for 2011 countdown, where he joined his own friends in the end because we didn't have the numbers. Or perhaps, no girls.

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There are still a couple more of them, but I shall not waste my effort on a write-up of their deeds. What we want to say is that, inviting you isn't because you are needed, it's because we are doing it out of respect and courtesy. It's because you are there at the right place at the right time.

We are not obliged to cater for you. It's only because we treasure true friendships that we go to great length to make things happen for you.

Remember this very clearly, we do not expect anything back for what we have done for people like you.

When you are whining over a couple of dollars, we are more than glad to pay up for you.

When you are whining about the lack of participants, trust me, we are crazily looking for people without you knowing or even lifting a finger.

When you are whining about having nothing to do, we do our best, as true friends, to make sure that we cook something up just for you.

When you are whining about how boring the outing is, we behave like clowns, putting our images at risk, just to put a smile on you.

Whenever you make an excuse, we feel that our intelligence has been insulted.

Whenever you make an irresponsible remark("Bo jio"), we feel cheated.

As a human being, why would you say "Bo jio" when you don't have the intention to go in the first place? Since even after inviting you, you refused to go.

It really seems like a low-blow, a pitiful act to gain sympathy from the rest. By doing so, don't you know that you are putting us in a bad light for something that isn't our fault? Do you think that it is fun to shift your own fault to others in order to make yourself look better?

If this is how you define friendship, it's heartbreaking. True friends deserve only the truth. Truth hurts for acquaintances, but it makes the bond between true friends that much stronger.

Is this a black sheep or has Christianity turned cult-ish?

Read the article on the link posted below before continuing.

http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2012/01/23/dont-take-it-from-me-reasons-you-should-not-marry-an-unbeliever/

Upon reading this article mid-way, I was enraged. I'm a NON-JUSTINBELIEBER, as indicated by Christians from all over the world. In fact, I'm a Taoist, who can't even differentiate Buddhism from Taoist. To me, both are good, just because I love the tales involving the Deities and Generals.

Religion was never something important to me. It was often more of pleasing my mum by going through the rituals. But in every ritual, I will put my utmost respect into whatever I am doing. This is not because I am a hardcore believer, but as a human being, I am taught to be respectful to EVERYTHING.

Therefore, if I ever ever have to step into the church, I will show the same utmost respect to Jesus in the house. You might say it's no big deal, but to some Christians, it's hell of a great deal! If they ever ever have to be in a temple, they will not be able to complete the rituals as they can't make themselves bow down to the Deities.

"I shall not bow down to anyone else except for God." Oh please, what an excuse. Go to army, and tell that to my Sergeant. He will whack you upside down inside out.

If you realised, no one has a problem visiting a temple (other than perhaps Christians), but every other NON-JUSTINBELIEBER has qualms visiting a church. I shall not say why, but go figure.

Back to the topic. I was so enraged that I was about to post this on facebook.

"I don't care how many people I offend, but a big F U to the author of this article. Is xtianity a cult or what? If you can only breed among yourselves, then go build your own planet. Religion is for spreading values, not propaganda and brainwashing. Gosh."

After giving it some thoughts, I decided not to. It was socially irresponsible to post such comment publicly, as my goal isn't to BRAINWASH others into believing otherwise. I wouldn't want my selfish opinion to affect the lives of others too.

For eternity, Christianity is one of the religion that constantly discriminate against other religions. Wassup with there is no other god? Does Taoist mention that? Does Buddhism mention that? Why are 75% of the Christians I met in life (be it friends or strangers), constantly preaching about their Religion and asking us to go to their churches, hoping to see miracles.

I have seen enough miracles here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jYjgeayfYPI

Derren Brown is the equivalence of Jesus in my heart. I wouldn't say every faith healer out there is a scam (although I believe 99% are), but why not see it in a logical way?

Can a deaf really turn un-deaf in a matter of seconds? A cancer patient recovering from a touch of holiness? COME ON. Your parents paid tons of money, making sure you pay attention in school. Don't you think you are letting them down?

If you are still not convinced, please go back to University or Poly, sign up for Psychology. In that course, you will be taught how human behaves and reacts, both individually or collectively.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deindividuation

Just like in a concert. 10% of the audiences started screaming. Another 15% followed. 50% of the audiences. 60%. 75%. 90%. We got an energetic crowd here. And this, generates adrenaline in everyone's body.

I'm too lazy to explain how people can feel nauseous or even faint from a touch, and if you're really a keen learner and a believer in YOURSELF(human science), you will be able to find the answers relatively fast.

To many of us, miracles just don't happen. Given a choice, I would rather believe in UFO, as my aunt caught it on camera.

If Christianity is a little less pushy, a little more tolerant of other's existence, a little less exaggerated, a little more respectful, a little less commercialized, I believe everyone will be more receptive of it.

Telling Christians that they are dumb to marry a NON-JUSTINBELIEBER? Not the wisest choice dude. Of course, unless your intention is to wage a holy war. Go figure.

HAPPY CNY!!!

Heyo heyo! A brand new year with a brand new start. Not really a brand new start imo, but at least that's something which is widely accepted. A reason for everyone to clean the slate and do bad-der things in the upcoming 12 months.

So sorry sNorEeEpi, I've neglected you long enough. You've always been there when I am down, but I'm not there for you at all times :( I would love to pen down all my thoughts every now and then, but my thoughts are flooding in all of the time. By the time I have access to my computer, my emotion would have been hijacked by another thought that conveniently opened the door and let the previous thought out. It feels SOOOO GOOOOOOOOD to be able to write in proper English (not the best, but reasonably satisfying). It's been so long, and I'm back!

I've quite a few thoughts that I would like to pen down, but not at the moment. You know, I don't blog for the sake of blogging. Each and every post is a true reflection of me and my thoughts. If I have to force myself to write something out of nothing, I'd rather go rob a bank and kiss random girls on the street. Not to say that I wouldn't rob a bank or kiss random girls on the street if given the chance... but I refrain from doing that :D

I've decided to adopt a new methodology in my blogging approach. I shall pen down the issues and thoughts that I would like to talk about in the future, and when the time is right, I'll just create a new post on the topics listed previously. Given my short term memory, I hope this helps. Here goes:

1) The kind of people one attracts is determined by how he/she acts and portrays him/her-self.

2) I'm not dumb, but I love to act dumb.

3) Everyone shouts "Love me for who I am!", "If you don't love me at my worst, you don't deserve me.". But who exactly accepts people at their worst?

Ok~ I guessed that would be a long enough list for now. As for viewership... I'm still pondering as to whether I should make this public or not. At some point, I'm sure I will be criticizing someone that I knew. I wouldn't want to hurt his/her feelings, but at the same time, I wouldn't want someone to jump to conclusion when the post is obviously not talking about him/her!

Pros:

1) People can get a feel on my real thoughts and understand where I am coming from. It's a complex world in Zhong Ming's mind, so I have a lot of difficulty expressing all my thoughts in an orderly manner to make sense verbally.

2) Nothing but the truth. If I did something that you couldn't understand why, maybe you can find the answer here. It would be better than assuming as I guessed, most people would be too shy or intimidated to ask me directly.

Cons:

1) Taking things out of context. Self-explanatory.

2) Assuming a role in my blog post when it was never meant to be. MOST OF THE TIME, my blog post isn't targeted at anyone. If I am, it would be close to obvious to spot.

3) Expanding on point 2, I like to question ambiguity. One of the most general topic would be, why do people do XXX when they themselves don't like to be the target of XXX? Some people would be greatly offended, which isn't my intention at all.

CONCLUSION

- I shall open this up for a limited amount of time, up until I post my first CRITICALLY-OFFENSIVE post. Then we shall see whether is it appropriate to let everyone in on the darkness within me.

That's all for now, TATA~! Have a great year ahead! (I'm not approving any excuse to erase anyone's past sin xD)

I

"Every day. Every minute."

"Yes. It's that way, isn't it?"