Nightmare

Today has been a very tiring day for me, even though there was nothing much to do in office...

I had to give up on the girl that i felt was the best at this moment of my life... But... What does effort on my side lead to? I'm trying so hard, yet all i get is disbelieve from her... Words are cheap, and i'm constantly putting words into actions to prove my sincerity... For her, her liking for me cease in the form of verbal... She always think that we will never be together for long, as she needs constant socializing thrills... I'm already trying my best... But what...? She always wanted to do something interesting... She not only shot my ideas down, but refused to provide me with any suggestions upon requests... Why... I wonder... Is it because I am just an entertainer... a joker in her life? Am i being paid to perform...? Isn't a relationship a 2-way sweet burden...? Too many things... too many issues... too many reasons...

Just when i thought i could just sleep my tiring night away... i was awakened by a horrible dream... I dreamed of all sorts of nasty things that further saddened me... I can't exactly remember... but those things involved her doing something... Isn't it the end for us already...? Why am i still so upset about it...? I can't stop crying... I knew something like this will happen... I was there when she cried... Now i'm alone crying...